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YOUR CHOICE = YOUR LOVE
- stephaniekroack
- Feb 26
- 3 min read
The Power of Choice: Why Love Cannot Exist Without It
I heard something today that set me on FIRE—and I had to share it with you.
🔥 For there to be love, there HAS to be choice. 🔥
Let that sink in for a moment.
How many times have we defaulted into control in our pursuit of love?
How often have we found ourselves gripping, micromanaging, or bending over backward to keep a relationship intact—whether with a partner, a child, a friend, or even ourselves?
How often have we believed that if we just do things right—if we are agreeable enough, selfless enough, or predictable enough—then love will feel secure?
But here’s the truth…
Control is not love. It is fear disguised as love.
And when we operate from fear, we do the very thing we are trying to prevent: we push love away.
The Illusion of Control vs. The Power of Choice
We’ve all been there. The worry. The anxious thoughts. The what-ifs that keep us up at night.
What if I say no and they leave?
What if I don’t give enough and they stop loving me?
What if I let go, and it all falls apart?
So, we tighten our grip. We overextend. We try to manage the situation, the people, the outcome.
But control is just an illusion. And worse? It feeds the very anxiety we are trying to escape.
And one of the most sneaky and exhausting forms of control?
Self-sacrifice.
We convince ourselves that if we just give enough—of our time, energy, boundaries, or needs—then we can guarantee love.
But constantly abandoning yourself for others isn’t selflessness.
It’s self-erasure.
And deep down, it’s a desperate attempt to control whether or not we are loved.
-- We think: If I never say no, they’ll never leave.
-- We believe: If I take care of everything, they’ll see my worth.
-- We tell ourselves: If I just hold it all together, I’ll finally feel safe.
But love isn’t something we earn by disappearing.
It’s something we choose and receive—and that can only happen when we stop operating from fear.
What if, instead of control, we chose trust?
What if we moved from fear into choice?
Because choice is where love actually lives.
Where There Is Choice, There Is Love:
💫 When we give our children autonomy, they thrive. We think that if we control them, we will keep them safe. But true safety is built in connection, trust, and choice—not force. When we allow them to develop agency, they feel secure enough to grow into who they truly are.
💫 When we give our partners the freedom to fully choose us, love deepens. No more grasping. No more fear of losing. When we stop acting from scarcity—when we stop believing we need to hold on for dear life—love becomes something far more powerful: intentional, expansive, real.
💫 When we choose ourselves, we choose love. How many times have you betrayed yourself for the sake of keeping the peace? How often have you said yes when every part of you was screaming no?
But here’s the magic:
The moment we bring consciousness to our hidden beliefs and patterns—the moment we realize that we get to CHOOSE what fuels our lives—we unlock a power that control could never give us.
We reclaim our freedom. We reclaim our truth. And in doing so?
✨ We reclaim love. ✨
Your Invitation to Choose
So, let me ask you:
Where in your life have you mistaken control for love?
Where have you sacrificed yourself in the name of keeping a relationship, when in reality, you were just afraid of what would happen if you let go?
And what would happen if, instead of clinging, you leaned into trust?
Would love feel different?
Would it feel safer?
Would it feel truer?
You have a choice. You always have.
And THIS...
Is What The Awakened Heart Program Is All About
If this resonates, it’s because deep down, you know it’s time to break free from control—
To peel back the layers of self-sacrifice, fear, and unconscious patterns and finally align yourself with deep, unshakable love.
This is exactly what The Awakened Heart Program is designed to help you do.
If you’re ready to explore what’s possible for you, I invite you to take the first step.
Book a free 1:1 assessment call—let’s uncover the hidden ways control has shaped your life and start the process of stepping into true freedom, true love, and true choice.
Let’s keep this conversation going.
With love and unwavering belief in your power,
Stephanie Rae
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